Clients Are NOT Your Friends
January 31st, 2008 by Cristina Favreau
Yesterday, a client explained her business model to me, justifying (red lights already) why she thought she should attend a trade show as a vendor, putting her family $5000+ in debt: “If I’m a vendor, then I’ll get clients and contacts. Then I can build relationships with them and get referrals.“
Hmmmm. I experienced my typical visceral reaction. I asked, “What would happen if you turned that model around? Build relationships, GIVE referrals, and attract clients to you?“
The words were hardly out of my mouth when she replied, “I’m scared of doing it that way.“
“Scared of what, exactly?“
“My model is safe. In doing it the other way, I’m putting myself out there to be rejected.“
AH! The coachable moment. I knew we were on to something.
As I gently delved deeper, I discovered my client had recently felt like she was “burned” by a potential client. A professor was highly interested in her service a few months ago, and gladly offered to be her guinea pig. He raved about her service during the trial period, but when it ended, the professor, according to my client, ignored her. He didn’t reply to emails or voice mail. My client understood that as his way of saying he had no need for her service and wouldn’t give her referrals, not even a testimonial.
In my clients’ eyes, this was a betrayal. The way she sees it, she “sold” him her service (”He agreed to a trial run. He really wanted my service.“), spent lots of time and energy building a relationship, hoping he’d turn into a paying client and/or a referral source. “After all,” my client reasoned, “he knows me personally. How can he reject me like that?” I even caught her using the word “jerk“…
That’s when the old tell-it-the-way-it-is-Cristina turned it on. I had to lay it out for her.
“A business relationship is NOT a personal relationship. He doesn’t REALLY know you personally. It’s not personal, it’s business. Besides, even if he does come right out and say ‘no, I don’t need your service’ — or anyone for that matter — it just means ‘not now.’ You can’t give up that easily.“
I took it a step further. “Instead of taking his non-response as a rejection, take it as feedback – and always assume the best. This professor is probably so busy, he really DOES need your service, but he just doesn’t have the time to sit down and write an email or pick up the phone to call you. Assume the best and your reaction will be a positive one.“
It was a hard pill to swallow, but after a deep, cleansing and reflective sigh, she understood the message. Clients are not friends. It’s business, not personal.
By the end of our call she was excited to implement a few follow-up strategies, without annoying the busy professor, and without putting the family in debt.
I’d love to find out your thoughts. How do you view your clients? Does viewing them as friends help or hinder your business? How do you degage without being unresponsive or cool? How do you get close without crossing the line?
If you liked this post, consider treating me to a Tim Hortons' French Vanilla coffee.
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