Is Your Competitor A Networking Know-It-All?
March 10th, 2009 by Cristina Favreau
This question came up on LinkedIn a few weeks ago:
What do you do at a Business Networking meeting when you meet a competitor who seems to know everyone … and you don’t…?
I felt compelled to leave this reply:
I tend to use my natural defense mechanism (to be disarmingly charming) to my advantage.
I would befriend this competitor and make him/her my ally. I’ve had no qualms in the past about saying things such as “It seems like you know everyone here and I don’t know a soul. Is there anyone here I should meet? How did you get to know all these people?” etc. Ask questions and figure out how they got to where they are today.
There’s no disgrace in admitting a weakness and asking for help.
This may seem counterintuitive, but GIVING a referral is the best way to GET a referral. I’m not saying you must give a referral to your competitor (but don’t rule it out). Approach your networking group from the standpoint of “Who can sincerely refer to this person?” Make the referral and follow up. Yeah, it’s a little more work, but well worth it. You’ll create meaningful relationships and you’ll get known in no time flat!
A few days later, I received a message from the woman who asked the question. She thanked me for my “refreshing response,” and said she loved the “really simple, practical ‘woman to woman’ solution.”
Since someone else found my advice to be useful, I thought I’d share it with you here and see what you thought of it.
That's great advice, Cristina. Giving a referral creates a subtle obligation to provide one back (like buying lunch for a friend; they will usually pay next time) – especially if you provide real value.
Befriending the competitor is a great idea. You immediately have something in common, and if you add them to your network – you may get overflow work or the occasional project that is out of your competitor's scope.
When asked how I deal with competitors, I usually reply, “I don't have competitors. Just people with whom I have not yet cooperated.” (Needs to be said with self-deprecating humour.) I hadn't thought before about taking it to the point of asking them for intros – a really nice twist!
Hi,
I too am follower of the practice that “Networking” is one of the most important aspects of Business Developement.
In the near futrue: Networking and Referal marketing will be the saviour for many companies rather than SEM etc.
Thanks.
Ricky
You’re so right! In my experience, people love sharing information (to certain extent) and give advice. It makes them feel good and validates their standing as an authority. Sounds like a win-win situation. But here’s my question – same situation (a competitor who knows everybody and is “a fixture” of a networking group), but this time around you just know (after chatting with them and checking out their website, portfolio, etc, that the products/services they offer are outdated and inferior. I’m not trying to be snobby about it. But I was pushed out of one of the networking groups by one such competitor (the group had a policy of allowing only one member from each type of business). rn
You're so right! In my experience, people love sharing information (to certain extent) and give advice. It makes them feel good and validates their standing as an authority. Sounds like a win-win situation. But here's my question – same situation (a competitor who knows everybody and is “a fixture” of a networking group), but this time around you just know (after chatting with them and checking out their website, portfolio, etc, that the products/services they offer are outdated and inferior. I'm not trying to be snobby about it. But I was pushed out of one of the networking groups by one such competitor (the group had a policy of allowing only one member from each type of business).